About Me
I came to the U.S. at age of 12 with my mother. We settled in sunny Florida, which was quite a contrast to Minsk. I have always been fascinated by sex and relationships. Sex Secrets is where I share sex advice, experiences, news, and sometimes a little humor. If you have a question about sex that you prefer not to post in the comments, you can email me at svetlanaivano(at)yahoo.com.
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The Problem with Porn Is Its Quality

Lili Radloff argues that the problem with porn is its poor quality.

You know how people are always going on about the bad acting in porn movies? I don’t get it. I mean technically these people aren’t actors. They’re professional… er, lovers. Which means the more pertinent question should be: “why are porn stars so bad at sex?”

I was struck by this again when I watched a wee bit of porn this weekend (strictly for work purposes of course). As usual I was slightly put off by the bad lighting, terrible hair and make-up – good heavens those nails! – cheesy, very unsexy scenarios and the undertone of female humiliation (more about this later).

Mostly I was just stunned by the lack of technique displayed by the performers and the lack of eroticism of it all. The kisses looked gross, the cunnilingus looked painful and the actual penetration looked chafey. (Women giving blowjobs excepted – they were pretty good). Read more

I couldn’t agree more. I realize that most porn videos are meant to be exciting and entertaining for men and are not intended to be documentaries or sex education. However, most of them are so unrealistic, that they’re just not erotic to me. Also, as Lili Radloff says, the sex techniques are often just bad or ridiculous.

Generally, the only porn I like are the amateur videos – the real ones, not the fake “amateur” videos. Those are the only ones where the reactions of the women to what’s happening ring true enough that I can relate to it and get turned on.

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