About Me
I came to the U.S. at age of 12 with my mother. We settled in sunny Florida, which was quite a contrast to Minsk. I have always been fascinated by sex and relationships. Sex Secrets is where I share sex advice, experiences, news, and sometimes a little humor. If you have a question about sex that you prefer not to post in the comments, you can email me at svetlanaivano(at)yahoo.com.
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The 9 Most Ridiculous Penis Stories of 2009

I don’t know why stories about the misadventures of men and their penises are funny, but they almost always are. The Frisky reviews the nine most ridiculous penis stories of 2009.

There are some pretty crazy people out there. A lot of them have penises, and many of those penises have had hilariously insane things happen to them. So, if you’re not planning on eating a salami sandwich for lunch, feast on these nine amazing sausage stories from 2009!

  • Don’t Drink And Ink: Who doesn’t love vodka? But sometimes, you can love it too much. In October, a 27-year-old Swedish guy named Joel got so drunk that when he woke up, he had a tattoo of a 6-inch penis on his thigh. Apparently, he drunkenly went to a parlor for one of those hipster mustache finger tats, but then let the tattoo artist do whatever he wanted. Hmm, on second thought, we hope that was the only penis violation of the night. Read more
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    Recent Comments
    • Tamati: My honey and i have sex at least once a day on average and it amazing. We have been married for a little over...
    • Svetlana Ivanova: Yes, the evolutionary theory is probably right. Human males don’t have bright colors or tail...
    • Danny: I love reading your stuff, and I definitely agree that size matters big time. Even though many women would...
    • Katie: Great article, this is exactly what I have been doing with my husband for years now. All massage’s with...
    • Svetlana Ivanova: More women than you might think actually measure a particularly large penis. That’s how they...
    • John Mode: Either women are very poor judges of how big an inch actually is, or they have very unrealistic...
    • Pillywiggins: I like a big cock and being fucked really hard and deep. I never really complain about dick size....
    • Svetlana Ivanova: Typically, the watching part is more of a turn-on for the man, who gets to see his wife experience...
    • Svetlana Ivanova: It should if the woman already has experience with big penises, and the man knows what he’s...
    • Astra Kiro: This feel good sensation applies to all women with men,even in first date circumstances?