About Me
I came to the U.S. at age of 12 with my mother. We settled in sunny Florida, which was quite a contrast to Minsk. I have always been fascinated by sex and relationships. Sex Secrets is where I share sex advice, experiences, news, and sometimes a little humor. If you have a question about sex that you prefer not to post in the comments, you can email me at svetlanaivano(at)yahoo.com.
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Ten Tips for Enjoyable Orgasms

In observance of National Orgasm Day (July 31), sex and relationship psychologist Dr. Petra Boynton gives ten tips for enjoyable orgasms. Here’s just one that, if followed, could relieve a lot of couples’ performance anxiety.

Orgasms don’t have to happen in any set order
We have the mistaken view that straight sex goes something like this. A bit of kissing, some ‘foreplay’, she comes first (preferably with a lot of noise, some ejaculation and more than one orgasm), then he comes in pints. For gay or lesbian sex there’s the myth that a same-sex partner will automatically know what feels right for you – but even here people still tend to stick to the same kind of sexual script.

There is no reason why sex has to end in orgasm – particularly not a guy’s orgasm. Often men have problems with premature ejaculation because they’re trying to hang on until their partner’s come all over the place.

You could think about a guy coming first, or perhaps not at all. Or a woman having an orgasm through oral sex or masturbation on her own while her partner watches before penetrative sex and followed by her playing with a sex toy. Or perhaps one person can just decide to pleasure their partner but opt not to have an orgasm themselves on this occasion. Read more

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Recent Comments
  • Svetlana Ivanova: Depends on the woman.
  • Fox2: Would that be most probably wouldn’t feel it? I have seen you say elsewhere that less than 5″ means...
  • Svetlana Ivanova: Some may, but most probably won’t. For some women in long-term relationships, penetration is...
  • Fox2: Not sure if commenting is working at the moment. Thanks but even though these positions will help maximise my...
  • Svetlana Ivanova: These positions help maximize what you have, whatever that is.
  • Fox: Would these positions help with a penis 4-4.5inches long and around 4inches around? Or do you need to be packing...
  • BOB: FUR
  • Svetlana Ivanova: If a woman doesn’t want to please the man she’s with, she’s with the wrong man.
  • Jane Doe: This article not only implies that all men want submissive partners, it tells women to take on a persona....
  • Svetlana Ivanova: It isn’t misogynistic at all. It’s realistic and sex-positive.