About Me

I came to the U.S. at age of 12 with my mother. We settled in sunny Florida, which was quite a contrast to Minsk. I have always been fascinated by sex and relationships. Sex Secrets is where I share sex advice, experiences, news, and sometimes a little humor. If you have a question about sex that you prefer not to post in the comments, you can email me at svetlanaivano(at)yahoo.com.

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friends with benefits

5 Must-Haves for a Successful Friends With Benefits Arrangement

JoEllen Notte says you must have these five things for a successful friends-with-benefits relationships.

I love having friends with benefits!

No-strings-attached sex with someone who I’m comfortable with? Awesome!

The thing is, because so many of us were taught that committed relationships were the goal of all sex, this is new territory for a lot of folks — and that can lead to trouble.

With that in mind, I’ve put together this handy list of 5 keys to successful friends with benefits relationships to help you keep your FWB time WTF-free: Read more

10 Rules for Being Friends with Benefits

If you’re interested in a friends with benefits relationship, follow these ten rules for success.

Rule 1: DO think twice about hooking up with your neighbor.
There are, without a doubt, many pros to having a FWB living in close proximity: Your walk of shame is substantially less embarrassing, you don’t have to worry about driving home after one too many glasses of wine, and usually you’ll be able to tell if he’s home. On the other hand, when the reality of how your sex buddy spends his time away from you—and vice versa—sets in, that geographic proximity could very well be the downfall of your casual relationship, says Rachel Russo, a dating, relationship, and image coach based in New York City. And after several 3 A.M. sightings of his empty parking space in your building’s garage, you’ll start to wonder how things got so complicated. Read more

Looking for Casual Sex

Heaven gives some ideas on where to look for casual sex.

8 Times Friends with Benefits Actually Works

Stefanie Faviochio says that friends with benefits relationshipd can work great if you follow eight rules.

“Friends with benefits” might be one of the most complicated relationships you could possibly get yourself into. This kind of relationship typically starts off really fun and convenient (a best friend who you can make out with? SCORE!) but almost always, someone ends up getting feelings which results in ruining the friendship all together. Buzz kill.

But FWB doesn’t always have to be a bad thing. In fact, it could actually work if you follow these 8 rules: Read more

6 Rules for Friends with Benefits Relationships

Funny Girl Sex Guide discusses sir Rules for participating in a ‘rriends with benefits relationship.

5 Rules for Hosting a Booty Call

If your friend with benefits is paying you a visit, Samantha Irby gives five rules for hosting a booty call.

… So you’re not ready for another relationship because you want to take some time to process this last one (smart) but would like the opportunity to road test a handful of new options (awesome) or you never had a relationship in the first goddamned place and just want to get busy with someone you would never introduce your brunch circle to (who are you, me!?) and you want to get your cute little face ready but don’t know how?

Well neither do I because I’m dumb, but here is how I wing that unnecessarily complicated shit: Read more

Booty Call or One Night Stand? Casual Sex Has Rules

When was the term casual sex ever used by the people having it? That quibble aside, I agree with Jocelyn Wentland that the different terms used to describe it have different meanings.

Casual sex isn’t just called casual sex any more.

A University of Ottawa researcher says young people have their own codes to describe sexual encounters outside of committed relationships.

Jocelyn Wentland, a doctoral student in experimental psychology, looked at the various types of casual-sex relationships among people aged 18 to 27 and how they are termed.

“We now have names to describe these things in ways that wasn’t the case say 20, 30 years ago,” Wentland said Thursday.

The four most popular terms used by those in the focus groups included “booty call,” “friends with benefits” and “one-night stand.” The remaining term has a profanity in it, but can be politely translated as “sex” buddy.

All the terms used to describe the encounters have subtle nuances of meaning, said Wentland. Read more

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