About Me

I came to the U.S. at age of 12 with my mother. We settled in sunny Florida, which was quite a contrast to Minsk. I have always been fascinated by sex and relationships. Sex Secrets is where I share sex advice, experiences, news, and sometimes a little humor. If you have a question about sex that you prefer not to post in the comments, you can email me at svetlanaivano(at)yahoo.com.

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booty calls

How to Master the Art of a Not-So-Subtle Booty Call

Corey Stieg reveals how to master the art of the not-so-subtle booty call.

The phrase, “You up?” has a way of taking a text message conversation from flirty to frustrating — fast. But sometimes, when you need to get across that, yes, you would like to have sex with that person in the very immediate future, asking if they’re up is a simple way to do it.

But people tend to have a strong reaction to this cliché booty call ask because it can feel selfish in nature, explains Samantha Burns, LMHC, a millennial-relationship expert. “[It’s] like the pursuer doesn’t want to put in the effort to cultivate an emotional connection, and cares more about gratifying his or her own sexual needs,” Burns says. Read more

Study: Booty Calls Hotter Than One-Night Stands

According to science, booty calls are hotter than one-night stands.

Going through a dry spell? According to a this sex study, people seeking better sex lives might consider becoming someone’s booty call. That’s right — science has found casual sex is, generally, good sex, but more so in a friends-with-benefits arrangement rather than in the context of a one night stand. Read more

Are There Any Real Benefits to "Friends with Benefits?"

Simcha of The Frisky says having “friends with benefits” can be fun, but it can also destroy friendships and stand in the way of real relationships.

Not long ago, I met a guy that reminded me of that sexy NPR storyteller Ira Glass. Instantly, I fell in nerd-love with this doppelganger. After dating for a while, though, we realized we had only one thing in common: sex. So we decided to be friends with benefits. According to a Michigan State University study, sixty-percent of college co-eds have been involved in an FWB relationship, and plenty of my thirty-something girlfriends were doing it to stay satisfied, so I figured I’d give the laid back, no-romantic-attachments approach to getting laid a whirl. A year later, faux-Ira and I still hang out and hump. After our most recent rendezvous last weekend, I began to wonder what I’m doing. What are the real benefits to friends with benefits? Read more

The 10 Commandments of Casual Sex

Having regular, no-strings-attached sex with someone you’re not romantically involved with has become such a cultural phenomenon that it’s acquired a name – “friends with benefits.” (Others call it “bed buddies,” or use more explicit terms.) To minimize potential problems and protect the friendship, follow these ten commandments of casual sex.

If you’re not getting yours then you’re not doing it right.

This is all about you and this is the type of sex where you don’t need to worry about who come’s first or his wants. You’re not developing a relationship here – you are supposed to be getting laid good and proper. Obviously don’t go falling in love with him just because he gave you an orgasm!

Save the drama for your friends.

A booty call, no strings arrangement, whatever you want to call it, is for S.E.X. It’s not for chit-chat. It’s not for him to play armchair psychologist and he doesn’t need to say all of the things that you would expect from a boyfriend. If you do this, I have to ask – Why bother? Read more

Recent Comments

  • Flinkd: Bigger penis is stretching the walls of the vagina better. (nerve endings feel more pressure, therefore...
  • Svetlana Ivanova: Depends on the woman.
  • Fox2: Would that be most probably wouldn’t feel it? I have seen you say elsewhere that less than 5″ means...
  • Svetlana Ivanova: Some may, but most probably won’t. For some women in long-term relationships, penetration is...
  • Fox2: Not sure if commenting is working at the moment. Thanks but even though these positions will help maximise my...
  • Svetlana Ivanova: These positions help maximize what you have, whatever that is.
  • Fox: Would these positions help with a penis 4-4.5inches long and around 4inches around? Or do you need to be packing...
  • BOB: FUR
  • Svetlana Ivanova: If a woman doesn’t want to please the man she’s with, she’s with the wrong man.
  • Jane Doe: This article not only implies that all men want submissive partners, it tells women to take on a persona....