About Me

I came to the U.S. at age of 12 with my mother. We settled in sunny Florida, which was quite a contrast to Minsk. I have always been fascinated by sex and relationships. Sex Secrets is where I share sex advice, experiences, news, and sometimes a little humor. If you have a question about sex that you prefer not to post in the comments, you can email me at svetlanaivano(at)yahoo.com.

Google Translator

    Translate from:

    Translate to:

Personal Sex Experiences

Sex with Circumcised and UnCircumcised Penis: Which Is Better?

Amanda Chatel gives her perspective about the difference between sex with a circumcised and an uncircumcised penis.

The first time I came into real-life contact with an uncircumcised penis was several years ago. Up until then it was something I’d only seen online as some bizarre curiosity to me, an American woman.

A friend would ask, “Have you seen an uncircumcised penis?” Then, we’d gather around a computer as the images were brought up, and we expressed our disgust.

It’s not like penises are in the running for any sort of beauty award but the way an uncircumcised penis looked to us — early 20-something American women who very rarely come across them in our sex lives (although more parents are opting against circumcision these days) — was a horrifying specimen. Read more

The Sexy Bucket List

Simcha at The Frisky has posted her “sexy bucket list.” I didn’t do an exact tally, but I’ve already done more than half of the items, and most of the ones I haven’t wouldn’t be on my own list.

One of the crazy/sexy/cool things on this list just happened to me for the first time. (I’ll let you guess which one!) Still it’s so nice to know that there are still some things I’ve got left to experience, naked. Heck, as a Frisky gal, you have to try everything at least once! So, that’s why I decided to make this list of dirty things we’ve all gotta check off before we check out. Feel free to add your own naughty to-do list in the comments.

1. Get your toes licked
2. Get your hair pulled
3. Get spanked
4. The ol’ finger in the butt
5. Hand someone your panties
6. Receive a rim job
7. Ride on top
8. Ride on bottom
9. Butt sex
10. Sex it up in a public place
11. Go to a lingerie party Read more

First-Time Sex: How I Lost My Virginity

I have already written about two of my personal sex experiences on this blog, My First Anal Sex Experience and My First (Surprise) MFM Threesome, but not about a major milestone in every girl’s life, losing my virginity. It seems a long time ago now, but it’s not something you ever forget.

After Christmas break of my freshman year of high school, a senior boy asked me out. I’ll call him “Jason.” Jason was good-looking and popular, and being asked out by him was a major boost to my self-esteem. I was embarrassed by my Russian accent  and still felt socially awkward and out of place. I even went by Lana back then, to seem more American.

Being asked out by a popular senior boy was also a boost in my status among my friends. They tried to get even by warning me that older boys expected sex from girls they dated.That did give me pause. I was no stranger to fooling around with boys, but my sexual boundaries didn’t extend that far. I had gone as far sexually as being felt up by a hand inside my panties, but up till then, only my bra had come off, never my panties. That would change soon. Continue reading

Bush or No Bush: That Is the Question

This past summer, porn star Sasha Grey appeared on Entourage, which seems to be a male version of Sex in the City. What set the internet abuzz was that Grey appeared naked with an, OMG, unshaven vagina. Opinion about her fashion statement was definitely divided.

Sasha Grey’s appearance on Entourage inspired my boyfriend to ask me to grow my own pubic hair out (which proves that some men take porn way too seriously).  I had only been completely bare down there for a few years, so going “natural” was no big deal to me. Apparently, we will all be going back to hairy vaginas because Cosmo has declared it to be the “in” sexy style down there for women.

I’ve since dumped my boyfriend. (Among his chief faults was that he thought that porn is an instructional guide. I’ll have my facials at a spa, thank you.) However, I’m thinking of keeping the bush. I must admit it’s nice to not having had to hack at it with a razor for the last couple of months, and, of course, if Cosmo is right, and hairy vaginas are “in,” I want to be stylish. Looking like a woman again instead of a prepubescent girl is nice, too.

So what do you think? Hot or not? Sexy or not sexy? Bush or no bush? Should I have dumped my new pubic hair style along with my boyfriend? Will having a hairy vagina keep me from finding a new and better boyfriend?

What Does Sex Feel Like for a Man?

One of my most popular posts, coming in at number ten, is What Does Sex Feel Like for a Woman? In that post, I try to describe what it feels like for a penis to enter you and move around inside. In a comment to that post, a male reader tries to do the same thing from the male perspective.

…  For me, the experience of sex begins in the mind, even before the first kiss that you know in advance will lead to intercourse. Your heart rate begins to speed up, you begin to feel the excitement in your veins, and your perineal muscles begin to tighten pleasantly. As you kiss and fondle, your penis erects, pushing hard against your clothing (and, for reasons I’ll explain in a moment, this is a sensuous and erotic thing in itself, for this man at least) and you want to take your clothes off. As far as I’m concerned, it’s more fun for me when my partner undresses me than when I do it for myself, though that has nothing directly to do with the sex.

When you’re both naked, then, your kissing and fondling intensifies, and so does the pressure building in your groin. The tightness spreads into the entire pelvic area but most of all is concentrated in the perineum and the sides of the testicles, along the lines of the seminal vesicles. You have an intense desire to thrust your penis into something soft (and this is a masturbation technique that many men use, instead of the penis-in-hand version). This stage requires a degree of self-control, since your partner’s pleasure depends on you postponing the penetration until she’s properly stimulated through foreplay. As far as possible I try and ensure my woman orgasms a couple of times during foreplay, so that she’s ready for what comes next. Read more

My First Anal Sex Experience

My posts about anal sex have always been among my most popular with readers, especially my post 10 Steps to Great First-Time Anal Sex. However, my own first-time anal sex wasn’t planned (at least by me) and didn’t follow the ten steps.

My first anal experience happened during my senior year of high school. My mother was out of town on a business trip, so my boyfriend came over that afternoon after school. We drank my mother’s vodka while we watched a movie. It didn’t take long for both of us us to get pretty drunk (which helped a lot for what was about to come). Soon, we had forgotten about the movie and were in my bedroom, stripped down to our underwear, making out. Continue reading

Fellatio from a Female Perspective

deep-throat“Graze on my lips; and if those hills be dry, stray lower, where the pleasant fountains lie.”– William Shakespeare

Fellatio is the act of applying your lips and mouth to a man’s penis with the purpose of giving him pleasure. Fellatio, giving head, blow job – call it what you wish – is seldom discussed as an expression of female sexual empowerment, but rather as a form of male dominance. Taking a man’s penis in our mouths is traditionally seen as an act of submission. It is assumed we do it against our will.

However, fellatio can not only give a man immense pleasure, but can also be extremely empowering for a woman. I view the fellatio as a form of male surrender, something requiring a mutual degree of trust and self-restraint. Continue reading

Recent Comments

  • Tamati: My honey and i have sex at least once a day on average and it amazing. We have been married for a little over...
  • Svetlana Ivanova: Yes, the evolutionary theory is probably right. Human males don’t have bright colors or tail...
  • Danny: I love reading your stuff, and I definitely agree that size matters big time. Even though many women would...
  • Katie: Great article, this is exactly what I have been doing with my husband for years now. All massage’s with...
  • Svetlana Ivanova: More women than you might think actually measure a particularly large penis. That’s how they...
  • John Mode: Either women are very poor judges of how big an inch actually is, or they have very unrealistic...
  • Pillywiggins: I like a big cock and being fucked really hard and deep. I never really complain about dick size....
  • Svetlana Ivanova: Typically, the watching part is more of a turn-on for the man, who gets to see his wife experience...
  • Svetlana Ivanova: It should if the woman already has experience with big penises, and the man knows what he’s...
  • Astra Kiro: This feel good sensation applies to all women with men,even in first date circumstances?