About Me

I came to the U.S. at age of 12 with my mother. We settled in sunny Florida, which was quite a contrast to Minsk. I have always been fascinated by sex and relationships. Sex Secrets is where I share sex advice, experiences, news, and sometimes a little humor. If you have a question about sex that you prefer not to post in the comments, you can email me at svetlanaivano(at)yahoo.com.

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BDSM

A Beginner’s Guide to Spanking

If you’ve ever wanted to spank or be spanked in the bedroom, this beginner’s guide to spanking reveals how to spank like a pro.

It’s not often that thanks to Victorian-era erotica, a 15-year-old girl experiences a sexual epiphany. But that’s exactly what happened to Katherine* during her sophomore year of high school.

When her debate team stopped at a bookstore on an out-of-town trip, a friend purchased a book of 19th century sex stories. You know what happens next: on the bus ride home, a wide-eyed Katherine pored over one tale about a man and his female servant. Read more

A Little Rough Sex?

Sarah Rae Vargas gives tips on how to explore BDSM without doing anything too painful or scary.

4 BDSM Relationship Tips for Beginners

Elizabeth Mitchell gives four BDSM relationship tips for beginners.

So you devoured all three Fifty Shades of Grey books, and now you think you might be interested in a BDSM relationship yourself? Before you go out and find your very own Christian Grey, peep these tips to ensure your safety. Read more

Could Bondage Be Good for You?

Those who enjoy indulging in BDSM are psychologically healthier and happier than the general population, say Dutch researchers. Those who played the dominating role in sex games were deemed as the most mentally healthy and submissives the least, but none of the BDSM participants scored lower than the general population in psychological tests.

Some may think it is perverse, but enjoying the snap of the whip or the clink of chains on skin could make you more psychologically healthy than those who enjoy a more mundane sex life.

A study found that BDSM – bondage, discipline, sadism and masochism – enthusiasts scored better on a variety of personality and psychological tests compared to those who did not have sexual fetishes.

Experts say this is because those who enjoyed kinky sex were more extroverted, more open to new experiences and less neurotic. Read more

5 Things You Need to Know about Spanking (Before You Try It)

A little spanking session in the bedroom is a quick, easy, and affordable way to spice things up, but there are important physical and emotional safety issues.

A little spanking session in the bedroom is a quick, easy, and affordable way to spice things up (look ma, nothing but hands!). But as with anything involving painful pleasure, there are always important safety issues — both physical and emotional — that you should familiarize yourself with first, before you go swatting away like gangbusters. Consider this the kinder, gentler way to spank: Read more

 

 

10 Ways to Have “Fifty Shades of Grey” Sex Tonight

Wishing your sex life was a little more exciting? Follow these moves inspired by Fifty Shades of Grey to add some oomph to your orgasm.

Fifty Shades of Grey has women talking—and thinking—a lot more about sex. But, it also has many of us feeling inferior. A recent Goodinbed.com poll found that 50 percent of people are bored in their relationships, and crave more sexual adventure. So how can you turn your love life into the stuff of fantasy literature, even if your idea of a “playroom” houses your kids’ toys? Read on for 10 moves you’ll want to try ASAP. Feel free to forward them to your guy to get his wheels spinning.. Read more

The Psychology of Domination and Submission

Domination and submission are coming into the mainstream and out in the open, which means that a lot of men and women must share these desires. What are the psychological underpinnings of domination and submission?

Has spanking gone mainstream? asks Katie Roiphe in a Newsweek cover story in response to all the hype around the Twilight fanfiction slash “mommy porn” bestseller Fifty Shades of Grey. Roiphe notes the coincidence of this trend of women eagerly consuming fantasies of submission at a time when women are “in hard economic terms” less subjugated or dependent by men than before. May it be “that power is not always that comfortable, even for those of us who grew up in it … that equality is something we want only sometimes and in some places and in some arenas …. that power and all of its imperatives can be boring”? Read more

Recent Comments

  • Svetlana Ivanova: Clothes are a human invention, not an evolutionary development, and the extent to which they were...
  • RickyP: About the evolution thing, wouldn’t penis size be more obvious if it were the “bright...
  • Ryan: Youkai, how could you have been remembering when you had such parts if you were born male? Or were you born...
  • frank: coming
  • Wes: Still one of my favorite positions. The wife gets bored with it after awhile, but indulges me. The article had a...
  • Tom: Nuru can be fantastic IF done correctly, with a person the uses the correct lotion, mat and stimulation. Because...
  • Svetlana Ivanova: It is very hard to find the right person for a threesome. I always recommend trying to hook up with...
  • Gary Denoyer: When needing to pee I pee then stop hold it pee hold it ect hardly ever have a problem but if so I...
  • Tamati: My honey and i have sex at least once a day on average and it amazing. We have been married for a little over...
  • Svetlana Ivanova: Yes, the evolutionary theory is probably right. Human males don’t have bright colors or tail...