About Me

I came to the U.S. at age of 12 with my mother. We settled in sunny Florida, which was quite a contrast to Minsk. I have always been fascinated by sex and relationships. Sex Secrets is where I share sex advice, experiences, news, and sometimes a little humor. If you have a question about sex that you prefer not to post in the comments, you can email me at svetlanaivano(at)yahoo.com.

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BDSM

A Beginner’s Guide to Rough Sex

Rough sex is now in the mainstream, but if you’re a beginner, Jenn Sinrich has some tips.

Sure, it might not be for everyone. But more women are in favor of rough, dominating, and submissive sex than against it. According to a study by the University of North Texas, 57 percent of sexually active ladies are turned on by the idea of forceful sex. “It all comes down to the fact that we want to be desired,” says Claudia Six, Ph.D., sexologist, relationship coach and author of Erotic Integrity: How to Be True to Yourself Sexually. And that’s totally natural and integral to a healthy, satisfying sex life, says Six. Read more

10 Tips for Adding Spanking to Your Sex Life

Erotic spanking is a mild for of BDSM, but you should still follow these ten “golden rules” to make sure it is fun for both of you.

Hand-to-bum contact, if you can pull it off without cracking up (heh, we said crack), is a great way to add some kinky flavor to your next sesh. It’s intimate, it’s saucy, and — when compared to, say, a whip or a flogger — it’s safe for newbies to try out. Also, one study found that it can actually bring couples closer. Now that’s something we can get behind (sorry…).

Try a few spanks during a particularly passionate bout of intercourse, or make spanking the main goal. If you’re keen on the latter, then follow these important guidelines: Read more

Choking as a Sex Move: Is It for You?

As BDSM moves into the maainstream, more people are trying choking as a sex move. Is it for you?

If blindfolds and role play have veered into vanilla territory for you and your partner, there are still plenty of sex moves that are considered extra freaky. Like choking.

Sure, it sounds intense, but experimenting with breath control, or scarfing (using a scarf to constrict breathing), can be an exhilarating experience for some people. Here’s everything you need to know about it before getting started: Read more

Bondage Positions for Beginners

Bondage has entered the mainstream thanks to 50 Shades of Grey, but it’s still new to lots of people. If you’d like to try it, but are not sure where to start, Mikayla has some bondage positions for beginners.

One of the very first articles I ever wrote for TT (10 years ago!) was on Bondage!  Back then bondage was a “hush-hush” topic that so many people were hesitant to explore.  Nowadays, bondage has taken on a more prominent role, even mainstreaming in some ways.  Heck, the ultra popular 50 Shades of Grey movie has many bondage-esque scenes in it!  Bondage doesn’t have to bbondage_positions_for_beginnerse scary, or hurt, or be something only “Dominant and submissives” would like.  Heck no!  There are some simple and pleasing bondage positions and scenarios that any couple could enjoy.  Read on for just a few and bring some bondage to your bed! Read more

Why Spank… Or Be Spanked?

Sex toy guru Liv explains why couples should explore sexual spanking.

While we have a certain Mr Grey to thank for bringing spanking out of the shadows, it’s still considered a little taboo by many. Misconceptions about spanking being the trademark of your local dominatrix leave many believing that this erotic expression is a punishment, rather than the pleasurable and exciting encounter it can be. All you need is a few pointers. Read more

How to Get a Man to Dominate You in Bed

A reader asks porn star James Deen for tips on getting her boyfriend to dominate her in bed.

Any tips on getting someone to unleash and act more dominate during sex? I want my boyfriend to fuck like you, but I don’t think showing him your work and saying “be more like him” is a good idea. Read more

A Beginner’s Guide to Spanking

If you’ve ever wanted to spank or be spanked in the bedroom, this beginner’s guide to spanking reveals how to spank like a pro.

It’s not often that thanks to Victorian-era erotica, a 15-year-old girl experiences a sexual epiphany. But that’s exactly what happened to Katherine* during her sophomore year of high school.

When her debate team stopped at a bookstore on an out-of-town trip, a friend purchased a book of 19th century sex stories. You know what happens next: on the bus ride home, a wide-eyed Katherine pored over one tale about a man and his female servant. Read more

Recent Comments

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  • Dorian: Does a woman´s preference for larger cocks develope over time and sex experience? Do you think that a young...
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  • Svetlana Ivanova: You should use the suggestionsn this article, and you might also squeeze and relax when he is...
  • Jessica: I have a question. i have been with a lot of guys and have tried having anal sex with most. Most failed...
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  • Svetlana Ivanova: Many women prefer to start small with anal, but big is quite enjoyable.