About Me
I came to the U.S. at age of 12 with my mother. We settled in sunny Florida, which was quite a contrast to Minsk. I have always been fascinated by sex and relationships. Sex Secrets is where I share sex advice, experiences, news, and sometimes a little humor. If you have a question about sex that you prefer not to post in the comments, you can email me at svetlanaivano(at)yahoo.com.
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4 Reasons I Don’t Hook Up with Readers

It will soon be five years since I started Sex Secrets. During that time, I have answered countless comments and questions from readers, and among those questions and comments have been propositions from male readers to have sex with them. To many men, this probably seems like a perfectly natural thing to do. What does it matter that they don’t know me, and I don’t know them? From reading my blog, it’s obvious that I like sex, so why wouldn’t I want to have sex with them? Several reasons, actually, none of which really have anything to do with them personally.

The first and foremost reason that I don’t hook up with readers is that I don’t need to. Believe it or not, men I already know, like, and trust are willing to have sex with me. Go figure. Anyway, hooking up with strangers from the internet isn’t necessary for me to get laid.

Another reason is that, even if I weren’t getting any, the percentages are against me when hooking up with a stranger from the internet because, the fact is, a lot of men are not that good at sex. I’m sure the same can be said of women, but when women are bad at sex, the man still usually has an orgasm. For women,, bad sex can cause not only boredom and frustration, but sometimes pain or discomfort as well. Yes, you may be the exception, especially if you’re a regular reader of Sex Secrets, but from my point of view, what are the chances that sex with a stranger from the internet is going to be better than what I’m already getting? Too low to be worth the time and effort, not to mention the risk.

Speaking of risk, hooking up with strangers from the internet is potentially dangerous. Although most men aren’t dangerous, it just takes one. I’ve had a couple of scary encounters with men I barely knew who turned from Dr. Jekyll into Mr. Hyde right before my eyes. They taught me to be much more cautious about having sex with strangers. Internet hook-ups are just not worth the risk to me, especially when I don’t need them to get laid, and the sex probably wouldn’t be that great anyway.

Finally, for me, just the fact that a man is trolling the internet propositioning women he doesn’t even know for sex doesn’t speak highly of him as a potential sex partner. It makes me think that he propositions strangers because the women who actually know him don’t want to have sex with him, either because of his looks or personality, or because they tried it and didn’t like it. I assume that they know something I don’t know and don’t want to find out.

If you seriously want to get get laid, don’t hit on a fantasy woman from the internet. You have a lot better chance of scoring with a woman who’s already in your life somehow – your upstairs neighbor, the woman you see  jogging in the park every morning, or the waitress who takes your order on your lunch hour Monday through Friday. They aren’t fantasy women. They’re real, and they’re right in front of your nose.

6 Responses to 4 Reasons I Don’t Hook Up with Readers

  • Alexandra says:

    Wonderful post!

  • Svetlana Ivanova says:

    Thanks, Alexandra! I read your post on the same topic, and I think we’re on the same page, so to speak :).

  • Gab Kay says:

    Interesting points raised! I have had some great sex with women on and off the net! Your point of caution with strangers though is worth heeding!

  • Greg says:

    I just happened onto your website while reading from another about Kama Sutra and Tantric sex.

    I found your blog interesting. Your MFM experience is something, beyond just sex, about how the other girl reacted.

    No one thinks about what it does to your head and if you are really ready to see this.

    Back in the day, crazy theater and music student, there were a few orgies. But anyone involve with someone, there is more to it than just having sex. Its seems fine, until its your girl or your guy. When they want to explore someone other than you.

    Looks fun in the movies, but not for the faint of heart.


  • Jason says:

    Thank goodness for that. I was sure you were going to hunt me down and ravish me. hehe :)

  • Svetlana Ivanova says:

    I could, but I won’t :).

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